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Speaking the Same Language

Would you know what I mean when I said other carers speak the same language? … I am sure you will, as I met up with a non Carer today and it was like talking to a brick wall.  She kept going on and on about boundaries, set boundaries.atlas-larger-150x150

Whilst I see what she meant, in an ideal world we as Carers cannot always set boundaries, things happen, the unpredictable the unexpected, and I cannot possibly tell my PIGLET, (person I give love and endless therapy to –  taken from the Piglets Guide to Caring), that I cannot possibly deal with this crisis right now, because boundaries need to be set and oh I have done my 20 hours of caring, so I’m off to the pub.

I know precisely what my loved and cared for PIGLET would say, you are a S H I……. Carer!!, I’m off to get another Carer one that is devoted to the job and not a part-timer.

We as carers, being the stoical creatures that we are, cannot be part-timers if we are devoted to the job, and let’s face it most of us are. We want to be the best at what we do and give love and support selflessly.

My so called friend also said I was being selfish because I did not take enough care of my health and well-being.  So I was thus being selfish by not being at the optimal health so I could  be there for my PIGLET.  Whilst I sort of see where she was coming from, I still don’t quite get it!! do you?  Love to hear some of your views.  Maybe someone else could write in next month and answer this story of the month with their views…. cos honestly I came away bewildered and confused and befuddled and quite upset if I am brutally honest….
Is it simply that because this person is a non-carer and therefore lacks personal experience of the job that they simply do not have a clue and if pigs were flying in the sky they would know more about that!!

That is precisely why I am on here, to link up with Carers who do know what the job is all about, and as Elaine the Founder states, “speak the same language” and I can talk to them and they really know where I am coming from.

So please some of my Carer Buddies, drop Elaine a line and help me out in the process, am I being over sensitive or am I right to be upset that I have been called selfish and all over the place because I have not set defined boundaries.  We are not dealing with a naughty child here who needs to sit on the naughty step we are dealing with PIGLETS that are poorly and it is not set to a clock when he/she may need us, they need us to be there for them and give compassionate, loving care to help them on their long road to recovery.

Well I will sign off now and I am going to contact a few of my Carer Buddies for a good old moan too cos they DO know where I am coming from..

Love to everyone,  Elena    xx


… A CARER BUDDY SUGGESTION …  “don’t feel guilty about indulging yourself once in a while, if someone offers to wait on you and look after the loved one you care for, let them … and if no-one offers don’t be afraid to ask … you might be surprised at the outcome.”

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2 responses to “Speaking the Same Language”

  1. nickbaldwin nickbaldwin says:

    Excellent article

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